To me, the process of raising money for projects was taking time away from my real work. Today I am learning to modify that concept.

Background: I grew up, in the 1940’s and 1950’s, in a poor black working class neighborhood outside Washington, D.C. Asking someone outside the family for help or for money was seen as bringing shame on the family. If the family could not provide what you wanted, then you were to “do without.” But the hardest part was what went on inside our family. Asking my father for a dollar was asking to be humiliated. You never saw a man get so pissed off and angry. And you never forgot his words or the way he screwed up his face.

Even if times were tight and bills overdue, money was whispered about. All kinds of unspoken deeds were done so that our large family’s needs were met. But body language and looks say a lot more than words; so at a young age, I figured out ways to earn money for school supplies and things like that in order not to ask for money.

Today, even asking for money that owed to me is not easy to do. When I support causes, with no expectation of anything in return, I feel good that I can help. But when I ask for a donation or contribution, even when the money is not for one of my projects, I feel like I am begging and that makes me feel bad.

So I was really surprised when an artist asked me why I had not asked her to donate to my Transforming Hate project. Knowing that she did not have that much for herself, I had not approached her.

But she said to me, “I like to support things that I care about. Your project would give me an opportunity to help with something that matters to me.”

If you would like tax-deductible donation, visit this link: Artspire Fundraising Page 

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Over the past 30 years, I have used different mediums and subject matter. This means I needed a website structure to present the projects in a way that is not object oriented. For starters I decided to separate everything into themes like Mel Chin did on his site. Themes allow me to consider the ways in which my work has been categorized and gives me the opportunity to set up different visual sequences.

I really enjoy revisiting the images. Many were done more than 15 years ago. Seeing them takes me back to the time and place I spent with each person – reconnects those moments for me. I shall be forever grateful to the people that allowed me in their life.

To make a tax-deductible donation visit the link: Artspire Fundraising Page

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I want to get back to work making images and putting together narratives but since the end of 2012 everything has been focused on fundraising for the Transforming Hate Project – clarifying goals, making a budget, raising money via emails, letters, grant applications and lectures. And now I am working with a new designer on a new website.

Fundraising – To have to take time away from what I call “my work” to raise money to get “the work” produced and “out there” has been extremely hard for me. When I say “hard”, I don’t mean hard like what it was like when I worked on the stock options desk or did spread sheets for those guys in mergers and acquisitions or debugged binary and octal code at NASA. At least I earned a reliable income from those things. I mean hard like giving up the mental space to create something that came from within to reaching for something from somebody out there. I know it all comes from the universe, but it’s a different way of functioning.

Hearing from other artists has, however, been interesting. Most seem to think that a person who has “been at it” as long as I have should not have to “ask for help” in the form of “small to whatever a person is willing to give” donations, contributions, and financial support. Many suggest other organizations to approach. I like hearing from my colleagues. I hardly ever run into you guys since I moved here to Asheville, NC and Facebook is no substitute to seeing you face to face.

So I look forward to letting you know about what I am trying to do.

To make a tax-deductible donation visit the link: Artspire Fundraising Page

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